Time to be alone and quit with myself.






I’m taking time to pause. And get quiet with myself. 


The past year has put me in a tailspin. 

First, my huge decision to leave my marriage with an overlapping partner to say the least. 


Then I put all of my energy into renovating my building for 8 months.

Then I went to France.

And now that I’m back and settled I need new goals.

It’s a beautiful thing to be able to dream big. And envision what you want your life to look like and whom you choose to share it with.


I need to get to a place where I can be fine living on my own and choosing myself over and over again but I want not to have to.


The past couple of weeks I’ve created a want and needs list for myself. What I want and need for myself to be a whole person and what I want and need out of a partner. 


Some things on my non negotiable list:

  • I NEED TO EXERCISE EVERY DAY.
  • I NEED TIME OUTSIDE.
  • I NEED MUSIC.
  • I NEED A LOVER THAT WON'T DRIVE ME CRAZY (sorry - listening to John Mellencamp)
  • I NEED TO BE AUTHENTICALLY ME.


And a goal:

Pay my construction loan in 2 years.


Now that I’ve made my list… I’m gonna sit on it.

And be alone as much as possible. And pay attention.


What I’ve learned so far is that I have anxiety when I have downtime. And an immediate need to fill the void. With something (an event on the calendar, a drink, some delta 8)- or someone. Being healthy is on my non negotiable list so I want to remain that way in those times that I feel most anxious and want to resort to an old habit. But it’s breaking that cycle. And getting to a place where I can feel ok doing nothing.


So I need a plan. And an arsenal of tools to cope.


I’m beginning therapy because that’s been so helpful for me in the past.


I want to go for more walks outdoors and not have to listen to a podcast to distract me.

I want to read more.


Instead of stress cleaning to ‘stay busy’ I want to just sit with myself. There is no shame in a slow life but why does it make us feel so fucking guilty? 


The rest is just as important as the work.


A series of white fabric panels showing a tiger illustration with text that appears to be part of an inspirational message.

I feel like I'm coming into my power.





I want to show up with good energy for my clients and be the light to everyone around me. And for that, I need to fill my own cup first.


Violet has had an emotionally and physically unavailable mother the past year and I regret that. But awareness is the first step to mending so I want to show up for her especially. 


Making space for her emotionally (not just providing her a physical space) is now my top priority. And the timing is good because I get her extra this month because Ryan always goes deer hunting.


So I'm chasing INTENTION over impulse.


What do they say- it takes like 30 days to make something a new habit?


Baby steps.

One day at a time.


In the end, we as individuals, are the greatest project we will ever work on, ya?


So we need to feed our souls daily. And only make choices that align with what we want and need out of this life.

We need to live authentically, too. And never compromise. Because we are all amazing and bring unique traits to the table.


We also need to speak the truth and be honest. Be honest with ourselves and be able to walk proudly.


But to be more transparent here- one major thing I’ve learned lately is that while yes, it’s important to speak to truth, it’s also important to practice discernment. I have been extremely vulnerable about all the things. Probably shared too much. 

I always tell the truth now but I do need to be discerning and control how much I share and with whom. Because sometimes it’s no one’s business but my own.


Not that I regret sharing all the nitty gritty details in THIS POST because I believe it was a spirit led confession and meant to heal others. But moving forward, I’m going to try to guard what should remain private.


It’s all personal development and I’m taking it in stride.


So progress, not perfection.


My intention for today is to show up for violet. Take the best care of the pets and showcase my amazing clients in my social media.


I hope you all have the best day and are living your most authentic lives,

Stacy. XOXO

A series of green motivational quote images about letting things happen naturally and trusting life's timing.

(p.s. I also need regular massages)

Modern basement lounge area with yellow velvet sofa, oriental rug, and exposed ceiling beams in industrial style space.
A portable massage table with black face cushion sits in a room with yellow chairs and a patterned rug.
A person in a white shirt stands in a dimly lit room with reflective surfaces creating a mirror-like effect.
A black dog with white paws sleeps peacefully stretched out on a tan couch with a pink ball nearby.